A Zen teacher might ask, "Who were you before you were born?" It is a question that invites much reflection, and can lead into a meditative state. Certainly, as modern day seekers, we spend much more time trying to figure out who we are now that we are born.

When parents gaze upon the peaceful countenance of their newborn, there is a mixture in the reflection. One part wonders who he/she will grow up to be. The other part speculates on how to create the person we want this child to be. Parenting is an art, and every artist knows the importance of getting out of one's own way, and allowing the work to just flow. The more we attempt to impose our will upon the creative process, the more frustrating it becomes.

Imagine a canvas that had been worked and reworked dozens of times. Imagine also, that the canvas absorbed the feelings of the artist as she worked. Imagine further, that several artists worked on the same canvas. Perhaps each had a different idea of how the finished product should look. Finally, suppose that the canvas had its own idea of what it wanted to express to the world. Once a canvas had been around for a couple of decades we can see that it would definitely be in need of some therapy!

What if we were all divine artists? Existing before birth as pure soul, we had an idea for a human being that we would like to create. We developed the concept and when we were satisfied we requested a cosmic canvas: in this case, a human life. What would happen if, once we got here, others assumed that our life was a canvas that they were free to work on? Let's call these people parents, teachers, or even peers. It seems that we would either have to give up on our own unique inner plan, or that we might have a bit of a struggle to preserve it. Staying true to that inner divine blueprint takes some doing, especially considering that we are working in an unfamiliar medium, this three-dimensional reality. How can we know when we are honoring our own inner essence, when our life is a reflection of that divine spark given off by soul before we were born? I guess we could say that if we have to ask ourselves that question, we are not there yet.

When we are living in harmony with our deepest essence, there is such integration that such a question could not even be formulated. Until then, we can consciously move in that direction. In Dancing Soul: The Voice of Spirit Evolving, I wrote that within each of is a cosmic time capsule. Regardless of what we have created in life, if it is not in alignment with our true essence, there will be an awakening. It might be gradual, or sudden.  Fortunately there is an inner push, that constantly nudges us towards our truth. It might be like a magnet that draws us closer to some people or possibilities, or like a dissatisfaction or irritation that makes us pull back. It is never too late to reclaim our canvas. The last stroke of the brush comes with our last breath. The problem is, we never know exactly when that will come. That is why we reflect upon our lives. We stand back, like the artist, looking at what we have created thus far. We know, without question, the parts we like, and the parts we wish were different. It is pointless to stand and criticize what is there, or to blame the others who put their own markings on a canvas that belonged to us. Our life is a work in progress. We do not have to know exactly how it will look in the end. With each sunrise we are given an opportunity to start fresh, and to make that day our own. One moment, lived authentically, connects us to the eternal. As we release all that is "not me", we create the space in which our divine essence can journey from mere possibility, to manifestation. That is where the bliss is. It is ours to claim.

Gwen Randall-Young is a psychotherapist in private practice. She is the author of "Dancing Soul: The Voice of Spirit Evolving", "Echoes Through Time: A Message of Healing for Men", "Baby Soul: A Blessing of Spirit", and has produced audiocassettes entitled, "After Recess: A Calming Meditation for the Elementary School Classroom", "Healing the Past: A Meditation for Wholeness", and "World of Kindness: Experiencing Personal and Global Harmony"

For products or feedback: gwendall@shaw.ca